14 January 2012

Ex-Wives Angry Over Paying Alimony


Here's an excellent article to check out: the one on women angry @ paying alimony to their ex-husbands. Thanks to Ferdinand Bardamu for featuring a link to this piece. Naturally, yours truly couldn't resist the chance to engage in commentary & analysis of the following article. Here goes...


Role Reversal: Ex-Wives Angry Over Paying Alimony

Long a Gripe of Divorced Men, More Women Feel Burdened by Spousal Support

ABC NEWS Business Unit

Sept.30, 2009

He got their second house, an investment property she had bought in Costa Rica, and a $96,000 annual alimony payment.

Wow, $96,000 for an annual alimony payment, along with the second home and an investment property on Costa Rica? Sign me up! I'm in the wrong business! Why work for an honest living when I could have cashed out on some career bitch?! Now we know why women have been so eager to marry us...

She got angry.

Did you get angry when this was happening only to men? Yeah, that's what I thought...

"It's so obscene," said Holly Chiancola, 52, a Gloucester, Mass. real estate agent who is fighting the terms of a divorce settlement ordered by a judge in 2006.

Wah, wah, wah, fucking wah! Now that I'm getting REAL equality, I don't want it anymore-waaaaaaaahhhhh!!

You used to hear about divorced men complaining that their ex-wives were unfairly cutting into their income. Now, as more women become primary breadwinners, the complaints increasingly come from them. The number of American men receiving alimony has climbed, from 7,000 in 1998 to 13,000 last year, according to U.S. Census Bureau data.

Yeah, but when it was happening to men, that was okay. When men complained about it, they were told to quit trying to get out of their obligations; they were told to suck it up; they were told that they hated women; they were told lots of things when they complained about unjust alimony settlements. Women raised nary a PEEP in objection to the injustices heaped upon men in family court; hell, a church mouse made more noise than women did about men getting taken to the cleaners during divorce cases! Now that the shoe is on the other foot, it's now 'different', eh? And I thought women were supposed to be the more empathetic sex-yeah, right!

Chiancola's ex, who declined to comment for this story, is among them.

Good, we need more men like him! When women start getting the equality they kvetched for, then they MIGHT become aware of the injustices done to men over the past decades. When women were making out like bandits in divorce court, everything was okay, huh? Women are fucking hypocrites!

BTW, if I utter or write the phrase, 'hypocritical women', am I being redundant? Am I committing some sort of grammatical faux pas? I was just wondering...

Thanks in part to the pre-financial crisis real estate boom, Chiancola earned considerably more than her ex-husband, a sometime carpenter and fashion model, during their 19-year-marriage. She said her ex didn't hesitate to take advantage of that -- even though her income plummeted after the real estate boom years, and she's now struggling to make her mortgage payments.

I wonder if the Bradley Amendment will be applied to Holly Chiancola? Or does the Bradley Amendment apply only to child support payments? I was wondering, because oftentimes child support payments are set high to include a de facto alimony component as well. I would LOVE to see women subject to the Bradley Amendment though! Then, women like Mrs. Chiancola, whose income fell due to reasons beyond her control (as has happened to many men due to layoffs, health reasons, etc.), would be forced to keep the payments up at their previously high levels; even though their decreased income could no longer support such high alimony payments, it would be nice to see women get a taste of the medicine that they've been dishing out to us over the past two or three decades. REAL equality would be great!

You know how to tell if you're achieving real equality? Do you know how to tell when women are being subject to the same treatment men are? They start squealing like stuck pigs-ha! They start screaming bloody murder! Waaaaaaaahhhh, this isn't fair-waaaaaaaaahhhhhh! It was all right when we were taking you men to the cleaners. Now that you're returning the favor, we don't like it so much-waaaaaaaaaahhhhh!! It was perfectly all right when I was stealing the fruits of your labor; now that you're doing it to me, it sucks-waaaaaaaaahhhh! You know what I have to say to that? Welcome to my life, Bitch! How do you like living in a man's world, hmmmm?

Chiancola said she partly blames Massachusetts' "outdated" divorce laws for her predicament -- she is a supporter of the group Mass Alimony Reform -- but she's also plenty outraged at her husband.

Ah, but they weren't outdated when they were favoring women, were they? When the divorce laws totally favored women, why the laws were modern and fair, weren't they? Now that you have fallen under the purview of laws YOU women pushed, why that's not fair. Tough noogies, Ladies!!!

"He went for the jugular, believe me," she said.

Uh, Darlin', I have to ask some questions here. How often did you cheer your divorcing friends through the years, hmmm? How often did you exhort, admonish, and cheer your friends to 'take that bastard to the cleaners'? How often did you cheer, 'you go, grrl!!'? Is this an instance of bad karma coming home to roost?

Aggressive pursuit of spousal support by men is becoming more common, some divorce lawyers say, as the stigma of asking for alimony fades.

Good, I hope the stigma against men seeking alimony from their ex-wives fades for good! I want to see REAL, genuine equality here, damn it! I want women to get what they said they wanted all those years and decades ago.

You know, we men have to stop being stupid, chivalrous fucks when it comes to women; we have to stop playing fair & just with them. Do they play fair with us? Uh, that was a RHETORICAL question, folks. Well then, let's treat women the same way that they've treated us in divorce. Only when women start to be AFFECTED by these onerous, unfair, and unjust divorce laws will things finally change. The more empathetic sex at its finest-you gotta love it!

"Early on, men were somewhat embarrassed to ask for alimony because it went across their defined roles in the culture. That has diminished," said Marlene Moses, the president-elect of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers, an organization of family law attorneys. "There's been a revolution of men and their rights and the vigor with which they pursue legal opportunities for themselves."

It's about damned time we pursue legal opportunities for ourselves! Goodness knows that women have been doing that to us for decades...

It's a revolution, experts say, that has been going on for more than 20 years -- actress Joan Collins' divorce and alimony case made headlines in the 1980s -- but today, it's still catching some women off guard.

It's only catching women off guard because the divorce laws are finally starting to affect THEM...

Take Terry, a 56-year-old Florida healthcare executive, who asked to have her last name withheld because her divorce from her husband is not yet settled.

Terry, the healthcare exec, is making big bucks. In the interest of fairness and the spirit of equality, she should share at least half of that with her ex, hehehe...

"He's a very independent man, a very macho guy, and I was quite surprised that he would ask for alimony," said Terry.

No, what you were surprised at was that he'd play the game the way you and your sisters would play it; you're surprised that he and his fellow, divorcing men are emulating women's winning, lucrative ways. IOW, now that the divorce laws are biting YOU & YOUR FELLOW SISTERS in the ass, it's not all fun & games anymore, is it? Now that you have true equality, it's all of a sudden unfair?! Cry me a river, Bitch!

You know how women are always bleating that they're strong & independent while they receive money from their exes? Well, I think it's good for men to be 'independent' too; I think it's good for men to be as 'independent as women are-all in the spirit of equality, of course... :)

Alimony Ex-Husband: 'I Helped Her'

I'll bet he did, because she wouldn't have time to do more mundane, routine tasks (e.g. paying the bills, looking after the house, et al) herself. Someone has to tend to the home front; in this case, it was her ex.

Oh, and I just love how the writer, a woman, tries to cast the ex-husband in a negative light. She doesn't simply say 'ex-husband'; no, she says 'Alimony ex-husband'. Would she have said that if the roles were reversed? Would she have said that if Terry, the wife, were receiving the alimony instead? No, she would not. If anything, she'd be bitching that the $2,500 per month is too low, that the ex was getting off 'too easy'. Again, women are fucking hypocrites!

Terry said her soon-to-be ex is asking for $2,500 per month in alimomy -- and she's fighting it.

You only got hit with $2,500 per month? Compared to most men, you got off easy, Darlin'. I hope that when you take this before the judge, that you get your alimony assessment INCREASED! Then, we'd have real equality! Then, you gals would start getting a taste of the medicine that you were all giddy about giving to us.

Terry, who earns more than $100,000 a year, said she's not against the principle of women paying alimony to their former spouses. But in her case, she said, it's not warranted. Her husband was laid off from an $85,000 per year job several months ago, but "he's completely capable of earning a living."

Oh, is he really? Just where is your ex supposed to FIND another job, let alone one paying $85,000/year? Where is he supposed to find a job paying anywhere CLOSE to that amount, hmmm? After all, this is the man-cession, isn't it? During this recession, it's been mostly men losing their jobs these days, or have you been living under a rock? No, you were too busy getting your spa treatments, more shoes, etc. to notice that, weren't you?

Secondly, your ex-husband has a penis, not a pussy. Ergo, being a man, he doesn't get any pussy pass like you gals do. Perhaps you women can easily replace a lost job, but it's not so easy for men to do so. Just because you gals get preferences for college admissions decisions; just because you gals get preferences in hiring decisions; just because you gals get preferences in promotion decisions and the raises that go with them; doesn't mean that men get similar treatment. If anything, we get the opposite. Terry, my dear, your husband may be quite capable of earning a living; whether or not he'll actually have the OPPORTUNITY to do so is another matter entirely...

For some men, just as with some women, it's past experience, not future earning potential, that weighs heavily on their decisions to seek alimony. One divorced New England man told ABCNews.com that he deserved tens of thousands in alimony payments because he played a key role in his ex-wife's professional success.

Yeah, past experience of being dumped on and discriminated against in the workplace prompted him to seek alimony-because he knew he'd NEED it...

"I helped her out in the background," said the man, who asked that his name be withheld due to ongoing divorce proceedings. Without him, he said, "there's absolutely no way she could have done what she did."

Now, we're about to get some TRUTH in a MSM piece. Can you believe it?!

Despite the increases in men seeking and receiving alimony, advocates warn against linking the trend to equality in the courtroom. Family court judges still tend to favor women, said Ned Holstein, the founder of Fathers & Families, a group advocating family court reform.

You got that shit right! You bet your ass family court judges favor women! Hell, if they favored women any more than they already do, they'd be women themselves. Wait, we have a word for such treasonous pussies: manginas.

"Family court still gives custody overwhelmingly to mothers, child support overwhelmingly to mothers, and courts still give alimony overwhelmingly to mothers and women," he said.

"The family courts came into existence years ago in order to give things to mothers that mothers needed," he said. "The times have changed and the courts have not."

The man NAILED it.

Recession Brings More Male Alimony?

Today's economy may be adding new men to ranks of alimony-seekers. As traditionally male-dominated industries like finance and construction continue to struggle, more men are finding themselves with lower income or no income at all, forcing a newfound dependence on their wives or, in some cases, ex-wives.

What they don't tell you is that, because we're not in any protected class; because we're white males; firing men is the most expedient thing for companies to do. If women are fired, the NOW Gang will come to their aid. If men are fired, well that's too freakin' bad; they'll just have to suck it up and deal with it.

Again, in the spirit of equality, I think that women should be subject to the same things that men have endured for decades: having all the responsibilities of marriage (e.g. financial provision) with none of the benefits thereof. I think that this is great! We need more men seeking alimony, so women can finally achieve the equality that they've fought for-ha!

Earlier this year, a British judge ruled that Elena Bowes Marano should pay her ex, real estate tycoon Peter Marano, 5 million pounds (about $8 million) after his property portfolio dwindled in value -- an order that Elena, originally from a wealthy California family, is fighting.

Such cases notwithstanding, a reversal of traditional gender roles in a divorce doesn't necessarily create more acrimony, experts say.

BULLLLLLLSHIT!!! If that were the case, then why are women screaming bloody murder now that they're being forced to pay alimony? Wasn't Terry, the healthcare exec mentioned in a previous paragraph, bitching about having to pay a mere $2,500 per month while earning $100,000 per year? Wasn't she saying, "Waaaaaaaahhhh, he can earn a living! Why should I have to pay him alimony?! Waaaaaahhhh!" Are those words and the tone thereof acrimonious? I don't know, but they're a great imitation!

Alexis Martin Neely, a prominent California family lawyer, is an alimony-paying woman content with her divorce settlement. Supporting her husband, she has said, allows him to spend time with their children.

"I do really like him being available for the kids and their school events and if he can't work and do that, I'd rather support him to be readily available for them," she wrote in a blog post. "He deserves it and so do they."

Prima facie evidence that women are NATURAL liars-what a crock...


All right, that concludes my commentary and analysis of this ABC News piece. I have to tell you, since I unplugged, seeing through this hypocrisy is so easy! I feel like I'm shooting fish in a barrel sometimes.

In all seriousness, I'd like to see alimony changed or abolished altogether. I don't like to see anyone, male or female, be unjustly punished by unfair laws. Clearly, the divorce laws need to be changed. And pigs will fly soon too! Seriously though, the only way these alimony laws will change is if women are affected by them. Otherwise, they won't give a damn about what they do to us. Then again, women don't give a damn about men anyway, but that's another post. Until next time...



Anonymous said...

"Chiancola said she partly blames Massachusetts' "outdated" divorce laws for her predicament -- she is a supporter of the group Mass Alimony Reform -- but she's also plenty outraged at her husband."

I saw these videos 2 years ago on Roissy's site. Maybe one of them? I think I heard Terry somewhere.


And it got changed last year as I expected. Life-time alimony struck out and more.


Just more proof that we live in a misogynistic society that takes 2 long years to get poor women justice.

Anonymous said...

Just a couple of things more this article could have used:
1.Number of men paying alimony vrs the 13,000 women.

2.Number of women in jail for non-payment of alimony
(none) vrs Number of men in jail for same "crime."

WooZoo said...

Wait wait wait.... I feel something coming on... a JT moment: "Cry me a river"!
Like whatever.

Anonymous said...

Let me tell you about the Bradley amendment. The one that says once a week's child support is owed, it can never under any circumstances be 'forgiven'. (Note the implication of a major sin.)

A few years ago, I was telling my best friend in the US about that. He said, "B******t!" His step-daughter owed child support while their father had them, and when she got them back, the judge ordered her delinquency 'forgiven.' And, the Child Support office did not appeal.

So, like most laws, the Bradley Amendment does not apply to women.

Anonymous age 69

Anonymous said...

"The number of American men receiving alimony has climbed, from 7,000 in 1998 to 13,000 last year"

Notice when the number of men receiving alimony rises from .0000000000001% of American men to .00000000001% it's practically near epidemic levels for women.

"Chiancola said she partly blames Massachusetts' "outdated" divorce laws for her predicament -- she is a supporter of the group Mass Alimony Reform -- but she's also plenty outraged at her husband."

See if you can guess what lines she wants to "reform" alimony along. Does anyone think she wants to abolish this sexist concept so no one has to endure what she went through? Of course not, she wants the laws "reformed" to stipulate that only men can be forced to pay alimony.Sure, it doesn't explicitly say that, but I'll bet my left nut that's what's going on.

"Early on, men were somewhat embarrassed to ask for alimony because it went across their defined roles in the culture. That has diminished," said Marlene Moses, the president-elect of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers, an organization of family law attorneys. "There's been a revolution of men and their rights and the vigor with which they pursue legal opportunities for themselves."

Maybe it's just me, but it sounds like Marlene is saying that like it's a BAD thing."Yeah, we're hitting a little snag here, it seems like these men aren't planning on bending over for any more impromptu ass-rapings. What a shame."

"but today, it's still catching some women off guard."

Translation-"Uhhhhh, what's going on here? I was told I'd be the one robbing HIM blind. How did THIS happen?"

TaxExile said...


Anonymous said...

Is this an instance of bad karma coming home to roost?
It's actually a case of what Shakespeare would say "hoist by your own petard"

If you don't know what a petard is it's like a land mine type bomb used in his day. So that line means that you blew yourself up with your own trap that you set for someone else.

chie Chaie said...

I think its good that women do this sort of thing. Its a real modern thing to do