08 April 2013

John Rambo on Staying Single


I was reading an interesting post over @ Roosh's place about how working for the corporate world sucks.  Since I've been there and done that, I KNOW how much it sucks!  Everything he says in that post is true.  However, that's not why I'm posting this.

No, I'm posting because one of the commenters, John Rambo, had an excellent comment about marriage; he talks about how much it sucks.  Even though he seemed to get a decent woman, it still sucks for him.  Since I'd like to help my boys, I'd like to pass this on to them; they need to know this stuff right here.  I shall post my thoughts amongst John's as well.  Enjoy...


@ erm, #27

“But I’d prefer to be happily married to a beautiful woman, with no fear of being cheated on, and faithful, and a dad. ”

Your first part is correct. I actually am married to a good girl, an Indian girl, who was raised in a village and has no connection or conception with the evils of the modern western world.

There was a very very wise statement I once read from an Indian spiritual leader. He said “A man who has never been married before thinks that getting married will make him happy. While a man who is married is thinking “Why didn’t I stay single, I could have stayed free?”"

Man, isn't THAT the truth!  When I was a young man, I wanted so BADLY to be married!  I wanted to have a righteous avenue for fulfilling my sexual desires (I was a Christian who took the tenets of his faith seriously); I wanted companionship; and I didn't want to be alone, let along grow old alone.  I thought all the thoughts John Rambo thought when I was his age-all of them!  Alas, it was not to be; it never worked out for me.  However, God, by His grace, has let me see that I really, truly am better off as a single man; in so many ways, I am better off as a single man-so much so I wouldn't trade it for the world now!

Yesterday, I spent time putting new tires on the scooter.  After doing that, I took her out for a ride to see how the new Pirellis were.  I love them; they handle and ride so nicely!  I also felt a sense of empowerment and accomplishment by doing my own work on my own ride.  I spent two hours out and about yesterday just because I COULD.  If married, I couldn't do that; I couldn't spend my time as I wished.  Even if married to a good gal (all but impossible to find in Femerika), I couldn't do that.  Why?  Because it's no longer about me anymore; it's that simple.

It’s a real catch 22. If you’ve never been married before, you don’t realize how boring and unsatisfying it is. But most men have to get married to understand that reality.

Some of us don't though.  Some of us have married guys TELL us we're not missing anything-even the happily married ones!  That begs an obvious question though: if they're happily married, then why do they tell us single guys we're not missing anything?

In fact, I know a guy from work.  He's the team leader of the department next to us.  He dated and ultimately married a little, Latin cutie from Ecuador.  When I ask him how married life is, he says it's good.  HOWEVER-when he asked me some months ago when I was going to get married, and I cautiously answered that I wasn't in a rush to do so-he said good, don't!  I never asked him about  why he said that, but it validated my decision to remain single anyway.

If I had come in contact with the MRA movement just a few months before I had, I probably would have given up on marriage entirely. See, another trap is thinking that foreign women are better than western women. Yes, they are, but even still I would not recommend marriage to ANY kind of woman, foreign or western.

I'm glad he said this too.  For the last year, I've been a member of the site, Latin American Cupid, and I've talked to some NICE women on there; this is especially true if they've never spent any time in America or learned any English.  Even though I met a couple of nice women, women who I would have spent time with in my younger days, I decided not to follow through with the opportunities.  Why?  Because I don't want to change my life now, that's why!  Even marrying the nicest gal in the world would necessitate changes that, at this point, I don't want to make in my  life...

Marriage is fucking misery, any way you look at it. I’m honest enough to admit that. A lot of married guys will never admit that.

 It's hard to admit when one has made a mistake; this is DOUBLY true when making the biggest mistake of one's life!  I can't think of a bigger mistake one can make than to get married these days...

I just wish I had waited a couple more years before even thinking about marriage. By that time, I would have realized how pointless it is and probably decided to never marry. So, cheers to all of the men who ARE intelligent enough to never get married, guys like Roosh and so on.

I can't say it was intelligence on my part-at least no early on anyway.  I wanted to get married as a younger man, but I never found the kind of gal for whom I'd be willing to do all that marriage requires a man to do.  There are some big sacrifices in there!  I was willing to make them and all, but I never found someone for WHOM I would be willing to make them; I could never find a gal worthy of making those sacrifices.  I also knew that my choice of a wife could make or break me, and that gave me pause as well.  Ergo, I never married as a young man.

As an older man, I will say that I'm intelligent enough to take pause, think, and look things over carefully before making any major decision.  After all, the impetuosity of my youth got me into lots of trouble!  I learned the hard way to 'look before you leap', as it were, so I do.  Then, when I look at what marriage entails in the era of Marriage 2.0, I just say no thanks...

I’m a 28 year old guy, so if there’s any advice I would give to men under the age of 30, it is this:
Do NOT get married. Once you hit age 30 or so, you’ll realize how fruitless the whole endeavour is, and then you will hopefully give up all desire to ever get married. You may THINK that marriage will make you happy, but it won’t. Even marriage to a super submissive humble foreign girl. Otherwise, if you get married and then realize too late that marriage is a trap for men, you’ll end up just like me. Drinking his life away to a bottle of alcohol, trying to speed up his own death.

What is it that Christopher in Oregon ALWAYS says?  If you can just hang on till 30, you'll be home free or on your way there.  Why?  Because that damnable sex drive starts to die out then!  It was the great, Greek philosopher that once said when he lost his sex drive, he felt as if he'd been released from the clutches of a terrible beast.  Amen!


That concludes this cautionary tale from John Rambo, and it concludes my commentary too.  TGIS, Baby!  Until next time...



Anonymous said...

"It's hard to admit when one has made a mistake; this is DOUBLY true when making the biggest mistake of one's life! ..."

That's the essence of the trap.

In order to fix what's broken, it has to be seen as being broken. Most people can't do it.

I went thru the same thing, but it involved a lifelong involvement in religion. I had to admit that I wasted all those decades, energy, and money on a sick, twisted hoax.

The way I see it, if they don't have the strength to overcome whatever is wrong, they deserve the misery they find themselves in.

And anyone stupid enough to marry a WW deserves a double helping of that misery. Stupidity should be painful.

John Rambo said...

John Rambo here. Thanks for publishing my comment.

The last part, about drinking my life away in a bottle of alcohol, I was just joking. I'm not depressed or anything. And I don't regret getting married to such a good girl, but I can't help thinking about how I would be FREE if I had not gotten married.

So it's a real catch 22.

My advice to all men- do not ever get married.

The simple two step solution to feminism.

1. Do not marry or co-habit with an American/western woman
2. Do not have children with an American/western woman

THESE TWO STEPS need to become the message of our movement. Because if you never marry or have children, obviously you'll never get screwed over in divorce.

MarkyMark said...


It's like I said in my post: just the changes I'd have to make alone are enough to deter me from marriage at this point. I'm glad things worked out for you. I think that, with a couple of the Spanish chicks I met on LC, I could be happily married. Again, it's the CHANGES I'd have to make that give me pause.

Combine that with the legal regime we have with Marriage 2.0, and I say NO THANKS!


John Rambo said...

Yea man, that's exactly it. Even if you meet a "good girl", it is still too dangerous to marry her because the entire system and divorce system in America is anti-male.

Me and my indian wife are living outside of America, and outside of the Western world. Living in Asia right now. I have NO PLANS to bring her back to America, because that would be very stupid. She'd get brainwashed by feminism and get spoiled.

American culture is completely fucking toxic. Best solution is for men to expat, and if that's not possible, just stay in America but remain aloof from women. Women in America are way to dangerous to even mess with.

Yea, I was also a deeply religious guy during my early 20s. Religion, in that sense, is a curse, because it brainwashes young men into traditionalism. And we no longer live in a traditional world.

If I had met Peter Nolan a few months earlier than I did, I probably would have never gotten married.

John Rambo said...

By the way, I was a fully celibate Hindu monk for 4 years, from the age of 21 to 25. So I had actually conquered my sex drive, I mean, I didn't even masturbate even once during those four years. That's how fucking focused I was on the spiritual path I had been following.

It's the emotional desire that is much more dangerous than the sex desire. As young men, we think that getting married will make us happy. We think that female company will make us happy. Yes, it will for some time, but in the end, it's better to just remain single and date girls. I'll tell you, it gets pretty boring fucking the same woman over and over again.

Best to never get married, and just date girls and that way you are never attached and can move on whenever you want.

Anonymous said...

"Yea, I was also a deeply religious guy during my early 20s. Religion, in that sense, is a curse, because it brainwashes young men into traditionalism. And we no longer live in a traditional world."

Excellent point John.

I was once a member of a fundamentalist church, and twenty odd years ago, our women had long been soured by feminism. The only denominations that have a shot at traditional marriage/family are those that remain outside of the modern world (i.e. Amish, as well as a few of the other Anabaptist sects, Hassidic Jews, etc).

Btw, I read that same article, and it was your comment that stood out above all the rest, and so it was good to see that Mark had touched on it here.

Doc said...

The key is to understand that the problem is in Western culture, so if you marry a foreign woman you have to keep her in the culture you found her - to do otherwise is stupid since she too will become corrupted just like Western women.

Of course, you DO NOT have to marry a foreign woman to settle down and have kids with her. She'll want to get married - all women do - but she will take what she can get. So just make it clear and have fun. Women are for your pleasure - never forget that, and use them to your heart's content.

Anonymous said...

I married my Mexican wife of almost 38 years, in 1975. That was after the first marriage from Hell. Am I saying my present marriage is paradise? No!

But, I have often thought that if I could change things, I probably would not. Not because things were perfect, because they were not.

But, at the same time, if I changed anything I would not be the same person. And, I would not be living in my beloved Third world Mexican village.

At the same time, I would not do it again. By 1984, what with marital rape and outrageous child support and man-fault divorce already in place, I said openly anyone who married after that date was a fool.

I issued a challenge in 1984 for anyone to show me any enforceable legal right a man gets in marriage. I AM STILL WAITING. There isn't one.

Anonymous age 71

Anonymous said...

@John Rambo: might I ask you which sect of Hinduism you belong to?

I've yet to meet a guy in the manosphere who is consciously followed brahmacharya between 20-25 (something I struggle with).

Sophia said...

Doc, I will respectfully disagree with your assumptions about marriage. I'm a 28 year old woman who has never entertained ideas of this sort...I honestly don't believe marriage works anymore. My boyfriend of 8 years is happy with our arrangement, as am I, so we see little reason to change it just to conform to an increasingly materialistic and shallow society.

Of course, we would never use each other as you recommend either. We have a very egalitarian relationship, and I would find it nigh impossible to think of him as just a penis to get off on...to do so would mean I'm not respecting his aspirations, faults, strengths and weaknesses as a fellow human being like myself. Obviously, he responds in kind.

I suppose if you are just "having fun" and are "clear" about the fact you are only looking for consensual sex, that's okay up to a point. But be sure you do not lose your sense of compassion for those that share intimacy with you, lest you become what you loathe.

Anonymous said...

If you can just hang on till 30, you'll be home free or on your way there. Why? Because that damnable sex drive starts to die out then!

That doesn't make any sense,you can always find some nice girl to have sex with and don't need to get married.

Sophia said...

Very true. I'm unsure why many writers of the manosphere claim that the male sex drive deteriorates beginning at 30. My boyfriend is 40, and we still have sex twice a week...often at *his* request. He doesn't even take supplements or work out, so I know there is no unnatural/excess testosterone in his body. Perhaps some men just have a prolific sex drive?

Anonymous said...

Old broad here. I'm out of the game. We're doomed. "Till death us do part" monogamy is the best way to raise un-screwed-up children. It's not foolproof, but it's time-tested. Western Civ will be swamped by a rising tide of ferals. We've killed the goose that lays the golden eggs. I don't blame you young men for avoiding marriage. It's too dangerous for you.

John Rambo said...

"I've yet to meet a guy in the manosphere who is consciously followed brahmacharya between 20-25 (something I struggle with)."

I was a member of the Hare Krsna movement, which is philosophically in line with the Vaishnava branch of the Vedas. Most people follow the mayavada or impersonalist interpretation of the Vedas. It's a complex subject and Prabhupada's Bhagavad-Gita translation does a much better job of explaining it than I ever could.

Well, back when I was a brahmacari, celibate Hindu monk, I had no idea that there was a manosphere or an antifeminist movement.

I was naturally antifeminist, especially after reading Prabhupada's books, since his books talk a lot about how feminism is evil.

Once I moved to India, I realized that it is American/western women who are fucked up beyond any hope of redemption. Indian women are the most feminine women on earth. After having grown up in a hellhole like America, being in India was like a fucking paradise.

Anonymous said...

@71-I issued a challenge in 1984 for anyone to show me any enforceable legal right a man gets in marriage. I AM STILL WAITING. There isn't one.

Marriage is a contract but like all contracts you can't enforce them against a minor or incompetent :o)

Another thing. You were young and dumb and didn't have any insurance to protect you against a default by the wife.What sort of marriage settlement or dowry did you receive? If the female turns out to be no good then the most she'll get if you have to split your property in half is her own money back.You also want a female who has her own money or income from investment or a trust if she's not working; or qualifications where she can earn at the top 2%;and is much younger.
Why? Because the fact that she's capable of earning a good sum(or has an income from investments) and that she's young will preclude her from claiming she's too old and unqualified to do anything where you'll have to support her after a divorce.
Most men can't do this because they're too ordinary(all the "game" in the world won't change this lol) and would be of no interest to the top females so I would suggest that they never marry so they don't lose the little that they do have in a divorce and CS payments for the next 20 years.

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