31 December 2011

What Your Wife Will Become

Guys,

I just ran across a Craigslist ad that cracked me up! It's from an obviously unhappily married man (redundant?) who's been married a long, long time. I won't add anything, because I can't. You guys will laugh too, and you'll thank God Almighty that you're single, happy, and free-yeah, Baby!

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For Sale—One (1) Wife, slightly used, 1964 Model


Date: 2008-04-14, 2:09AM PDT


Needs muffler, as it is currently VERY LOUD. Intake valve is stuck in the open position.

Rear end needs major overhaul. A crack there has grown monstrously large.

Needs re-wiring—Many wires are currently crossed.

Lots of little dings in the body, which have been covered up with too much paint in a failed effort at camouflaging them.

Needs re-upholstering—Carpet has turned a dingy gray.

Needs front-end work--Headlights are too close to the ground, and fenders are too far apart.

May not pass emissions test, as it currently produces foul clouds of malodorous gases on a regular basis,

Heater works great. Hot air is never in short supply..

Asking $500 or trade for 1984 model.

  • it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
PostingID: 641609489

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What else can I say?  Guys, if you get married, THIS is what you can look forward to-ick!  Until next time...

MarkyMark