Deconstructing Women, by Christopher in Oregon

Guys,

I was reading Christopher in Oregon's comments the Happy Bachelors Forum archives.  I came across THIS gem in which he deconstructs women.  All I can say is WOW-good stuff...

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Fellows;


I am luckier than most guys in many respects. Probably the biggest thing in my favor is that both of my parents warned me about marraige and women. My mother was very vocal about women and their nasty ways. For this I will always be grateful. She told me in no uncertain terms that women were pretty much all whores and liars, and that for all practical purposes, there were no exceptions. This view is echoed by the Bible as well, as shown by verses in Proverbs and Ecclesiaistes, for those of you silly boys who still embrace Christianity.

Probably the most important bit of information she gave me was that women do NOT age well. She kept telling me that if I could just get to the age of thirty, I "would be home free", as she put it. At the time, I didn't fully understand it. I do now. It's not just a matter of your sex drive diminishing as you get older, but something far more important. A woman's looks almost always head for the gutter as she ages. The more kids she has, the faster her looks deteriorate. I'm not talking when she hits fifty, or even forty.

Thirty. Maybe sooner.

This isn't just an issue of her face loosing that "youthful glow". I recall visiting a Christian relationship site recently that was tactfully talking about how a woman loses her beauty by forty. It said that she wouldn't turn many heads anymore. I thought, "Yeah; she won't turn any heads at forty. Maybe a few stomachs- but no heads."

This is one of the greatest secrets that few people talk about, and young men are almost never warned about. Women get ugly. BUTT UGLY. Even if she doesn't grow obese, as most women do, they develope cellulite.

Cellulite.

Oh, God. Have you ever walked down the aisle in a store and observed the women waddling along in short pants? Have you ever looked at their legs? Their thighs? A ghastly sight. Cellulite jiggling in every direction. It's like the old fifties sci-fi movie "The Blob". Sometimes I'm afraid it's going to jump out and envelope me.

Ick.

Ponder her buttocks. More cellulite. Lots more fat. You could set up a table for six on some of the female bums out there.

Her belly could handle the overflow. I was watching a show on one of the Discovery channels the other day and they were talking about how a woman's belly can grow and stretch to accomodate pregnancy. Yes, indeed. A woman's belly can grow to resemble a beached whale in short order. (It rarely shrinks back)

Contemplate her breasts. Ah, yes. The twin orbs of pleasure that young men so foolishly lust after.

Why?

They're a couple of sacks of fat with oozing nipples on the end. Very few women's breasts look like the one's you see in the movies. Normally, most breasts are NOT attractive at all. They droop. Sometimes they're not identical. Some look like gourds. When children come along, they sag badly. Very badly. Sometimes down to their belly, which by this time is also sagging in a race to hit the floor. In a woman, everything heads south, my friends. NEVER forget this.

I'm going to be blunt. Have you ever smelled a vagina? Seriously. I mean in it's natural, unwashed state? Really stuck your nose right down there and taken a deep breath?

Once.

My G-d. The stench could have knocked a buzzard off a shit wagon at fifty paces. To this day I swear there was a cloud of flies buzzing around that portal of doom. Sometimes when riding my Harley-Beasties around the rural roads here in Oregon, I encounter dead skunks. Road kill. We have a lot of them here, and when they've been baking in the summer sun, you can smell them a long way off even at sixty miles per hour.

Vaginas tend to be even nastier.

I have long said that a vagina is a cesspool of filth and disease, and that I will never place any part of my anatomy into such a sewer. With the odds that a woman has herpes or HPV, this statement is even more true today.

Nature has a clever trick to warn us of danger. Smell. If you encounter something that smells bad, or rancid, Nature is telling you to get away.

(Danger, danger Will Robinson!)

You are being warned that something is probably carrying disease, and is filthy. Definatley not fit for human consumption.

Consider what comes out of a woman's vagina when she has a period. It's not just blood, boys. Other nasty stuff sloughes off. If she has HPV, then dead warts (if she's being treated) come oozing out. Or dead pre-cancerous lesions. Scabs. Brown slime that reeks.

Doubt me? Visit any HPV forum and read the stories. It's enough to make a Billy-Goat puke.

And they wonder why so many men don't want to perform oral sex......

Think about her rectum. Yep. Her butt-hole. Think about how close it is to her vagina. Do you REALLY want your gonads slapping up against her poop-shute?

Really?

How carefully does she wipe after she uses the toilet? Do you know? Of course not. You're taking it on faith that she is very sanitary, and we all know we can trust women.

Look at her pretty face. Think about her mouth. Can you say gingivitus? Tooth decay? Mucous? Plaque? The human mouth is FILTHY, and a woman's mouth is no exception, bucko. She can also carry Herpes and HPV in her mouth from all those blow jobs she's been giving out to every guy in town. Blow jobs that mysteriously disappear once married, I might add.

Look at her beady little eyes. Will they look so pretty when she is squinting through glasses that are as thick as coke bottle bottoms? When they're oozing? When they are dull and lifeless as she hits middle age?

Have you ever watched how a woman's skin sags? Their skin ages much faster than a man's. Loss of collagen you know. They soon look like a mummy. Surely you've seen a middle-aged couple walking along. The man is fifty. In shape. Pleasantly greying on the sides of his head. A bounce in his step.

Jaunty.

Then look at his wife

She looks like an open-casket funeral. The stench of death is about her. He's just hitting his prime in looks, while she's flying towards death. Yes, she may outlive him. If you can call occupying a rotting carcass living.

Deconstruct the female.

This is a common theme by celibate males who seek to warn men about the realities of women.

Deconstruct the female.

I'm sure sometimes women wonder why I'm smiling as I go about my business. It's not just that I'm friendly. I'm deconstructing in my mind. Many times this has saved me.

Women produce the same filth and excretions as men. They require deodrants both for underarms, and even worse, for down below. What happens when a woman uses the toilet? Do you think it comes out smelling like roses? Think again.

Understand that your sex drive is irrational. It's designed by nature to get you to breed. Once the breeding is done, your sex drive diminishes and her looks disappear. Nature doesn't want her being desireable to other men. She needs to take care of the little children, so nature makes her ugly. The more children, the uglier she gets. It's a normal biologiacl result of breeding.

Stop and analyze why you feel desire for a woman. You're being manipulated by nature to do something that is NOT in your personal best interest. It will not be advantageous in any way to breed with a woman. You will be drained physically, emotionally, spiritually and financially. Consider the other examples in nature of males being used and cast aside after breeding. Once they have served their purpose, they are useless to the female.

Do you think you will be treated any differently when the female has used you for breeding? You will only be around as long as she feels she need you financially. No longer.

Deconstruct the female.

Understand what she is physically. Understand the forces that drive her to breed, and the part you play. Is this what you want? To spend your short life in this fashion? Are you destined to be a slave to your desires? Can you rise above nature? Can you use your mind to control your actions?

Are you better and stronger than the other creatures in the world, or are you a slave to your passions just as surely as a dog?

The choice is yours.

Clear your mind of lust. Avoid looking at women. Avoid porn. Masturbate if needed when yonger- or older. Don't date. Don't socialize with women. Concentrate on your hobbies. Your work. Your exercising.

Buy a motorcycle if you can swing it. Ride. Commune with nature. Contemplate your naval. Read the classics. Take up bicycling. Hiking.

Anything.

Use your energies in ways that benefit YOU, not some oozing gash. You don't have to be just another cog in the Matriarchy. Live for yourself.

Whew.

I must end this now, as nature is calling. I'm going to take a much-deserved dump in my newly redecorated bachelor bathroom that no Vagina-Beasty has ever fouled.

Christopher

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It makes you view women in less of a lustful way, doesn't it?  Until next time...

MarkyMark

According to the Bible, Women Are Incapable of Love

Guys,

While leaving a comment over @ Elusive Wapiti, I had to leave a comment on his recent post about pedestalizing men.  I posited that women are INCAPABLE of giving love as we understand it.  Here's why...

I have heard it said that God will NOT command us to do something we are not capable of doing ourselves.  In the Bible (Eph. 5), men are commanded to love their wives, but wives are NOT commanded to love their husbands; wives are commanded to submit to their husbands, but they are NEVER told to love them.  Why didn't God put that command in the Bible?  Simple-because wives are NOT capable of loving their husbands-duh!

That, of course, begs an obvious question: are there any good women out there?  As a matter, no; the Bible says that they don't exist.  Where, oh where, does the Bible say THAT, MarkyMark?  Ever hear of the book, Ecclesiastes?  Well, if you read chapter 7, it clearly lays it out in there.  It says that the Preacher (i.e. King Solomon, the richest, wisest man in the world at that time) one in a thousand men he found were good, yet not ONE GOOD WOMAN could he find!  Is it any clearer than that?!

Come, let us reason together, shall we?  According to classic Christian doctrine, isn't the Bible the Word of God?  As such, is it not perfect and inerrant, having no mistakes whatsoever?  Does not the Bible, according to Christian doctrine, contain the MIND of God?  Well, if God says that no good women exist, mustn't it be true?  If God does not give women a command to love their husbands, is it not because they are incapable of following it?  If they're incapable of following that command, doesn't that mean, by extension, that women cannot, and will not, love their husbands?

Ah, but MarkyMark, what about Proverbs 31, which lays out the template of the ideal wife?  I'm glad you asked, because I am about to tell you!  Proverbs 31 does lay out what the ideal wife looks and acts like.  HOWEVER-and this is key-I believe that Proverbs 31 is really saying this: if you want a good woman, GOOD LUCK finding one; they don't exist!  Even if they do exist, there clearly aren't enough to go around.  Finding such a woman would be akin to winning the lottery; you now some lucky SOB will hit it, but it won't be you, Hoss...

In closing, women are incapable of love.  Why?  Because the Bible never, ever commands a person to do something they are not capable of; since women are never commanded to love their husbands, they are not capable of loving them.  Also, Ecc. 7 says that the Preacher found NO good women; since the Bible, the Word of God, says that no good women could be found, there are none out there.  It's all in God's word, the Bible, folks...


MarkyMark